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23 Feb 2023
How an Old Dishwasher Became a Sage Teacher
Which brings me to a funny story.
For years I had this reliable, old dishwasher that was a real little work horse. I loved my dishwasher. After years of reliable service old faithful started to develop issues. It was frustrating and annoying when it had the audacity to break down. Fortunately I had a husband who could fix just about anything. Which I truly loved and appreciated — to a point.
My seventeen-year-old dishwasher started to conk out on a fairly regular basis. Every six months or so to be exact. Which often left me waiting, sometimes for weeks for my husband to return to repair it. The regular consistency of it breaking down and only when my husband was away started to give me a complex. We had conversations, the dishwasher and I but to no avail. It continued to breakdown regularly but only, it seemed, when he was out of town.
After five years of this little dance with my favourite appliance all patience had finally worn thin. I was no longer enamoured with my dishwasher. It was time to go shopping. Convincing my husband of the necessity of a new dishwasher had developed into a fruitless conversation.
“Why buy new when you can repair it,” was becoming his mantra.
One night I came home to yet another breakdown. Only this time I found our teenage son had repaired the dishwasher while his dad was out of town. The look of pride on his face was heart warming. But in all honesty, I didn’t know whether to give the kid a hug or burst into tears. It was the last straw. Now I had two repair men in the family!
I know it is wonderful to have a partner who can fix anything. And it was terrific that junior was following in daddy’s footsteps, and I love them for it but there comes a time when you need to move on. After my son left for work that evening I sat down on the couch for a long time – fuming. And it dawned on me – I deserved better than this. That was a shock. Why did I feel the need to “deserve” a new dishwasher?
I grabbed my purse, and I went shopping. I found two dishwashers that I liked. I didn’t buy them. Instead, I decided to wait for my husband to come home from his business trip the next evening. When he arrived home he found me standing at the door, coat on, ready to go out.
Surprised, to find me standing there, he asked, “Are we going somewhere?”
“You are taking me out to dinner and then we are going shopping for a new dishwasher.” I replied.
As he started to protest, I reminded him that I worked just as hard as he did. That I was an equal partner in this relationship. I let him know how much I loved and appreciated how he could fix anything, but I had had enough.
“I deserve a new dishwasher, I said, we are buying a new dishwasher,” and walked out the door to the car.
Needless to say, I adored my new dishwasher!
My dishwasher story, as I call it, taught me a lot about that feeling deserve. It was my wake-up call.
What exactly do we mean when say, “deserve?”
According to the Oxford dictionary deserve means “worthy of being treated in a particular way, typically of being given assistance.”
Deserving can be a tricky word, I think. You can feel that you deserve to have good things happen to you or you can feel you deserved to be treated that way. Or that someone, “got what they deserved.”
In my practice I run into all sorts of variations of how that word, “deserve” is used by clients. More often that not it is used to describe or justify their circumstances as a form of punishment. I have learned just how much this one word can build up or tear down a life.
Personally, I don’t think we give enough credence to how that one word, deserve, can disempower oneself of joy, love, freedom or happiness.
How do you use the word deserve?
Take a moment to think about something you dream about. How do you use the word, deserve when you think about that dream. Do you feel inspired, or does it take your power away?
Years later when I decided to leave my corporate job to follow my dream of being in a private practice, I didn’t think about what whether I deserved to do it or not. I realized that I needed to believe in myself. I deserved that much.
Does the feeling, deserved, take away your power? If so, ask yourself why you believe that.
The angels always say: God denies you nothing and you deny yourself everything.
What do you really believe you deserve?
It is time to believe in you. The world is your oyster. Embrace it!
You have earned it.
You deserve it.
Atherton Drenth is the author of Intuitive Dance. Building, Protecting & Clearing Your Energy (Llewellyn Worldwide), Following Body Wisdom and the Art of Intuitive Journaling. Atherton is a Clairvoyant, Medical Intuitive and Holistic Energy Practitioner facilitating transformational healing for her clients. She has been extensively trained and certified as a Medical Intuitive and Holistic Energy Practitioner. She has been in private practice since 2000. She is also a compassionate teacher committed to helping others develop their full intuitive potential through yearly workshops. She has a private practice in Ottawa, Ontario.